From 52186c1e1a80381851c6fc312f327a0d6091459e Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: Mike Gifford <mike.gifford@civicactions.com>
Date: Mon, 28 Jun 2021 10:51:58 -0400
Subject: [PATCH] Getting rid of passive voice, making shorter sentences

"be done" is passive.  We can just nix "what needs to be done" and it all should work fine.

Breaking up sentences & simplifying them.

This should follow the principles of clear language
---
 how-tos/clear-words/get-started.html | 11 ++++++-----
 1 file changed, 6 insertions(+), 5 deletions(-)

diff --git a/how-tos/clear-words/get-started.html b/how-tos/clear-words/get-started.html
index 6d4b6a75..74ca2a82 100644
--- a/how-tos/clear-words/get-started.html
+++ b/how-tos/clear-words/get-started.html
@@ -27,16 +27,17 @@ <h2>Why</h2>
 				<ul>
 					<li>Clear words benefit individuals who live with cognitive and learning disabilities, language impairments, memory impairments, and autism. </li>
 					<li>People with language impairments often have a reduced vocabulary and learning new terms is a very slow difficult process. For other groups, such as people living with dementia, learning new terms is not realistic or possible. Using common words that they already know will make the content understandable and usable. </li>
-					<li>Simple tense, literal language, and active voice make it clear what needs to be done for individuals who struggle to interpret implicit information. </li>
+					<li>Simple tense, literal language, and active voice make it clear for individuals who struggle to interpret implicit information. </li>
 					<li>Clear words improves everyone's reading success and allows for a broader audience. </li>
 				</ul>
 			</section>
 			
 			<section id="benefits">
 				<h2>Who it helps</h2>
-				<p>There are many types of disabilities that can make it harder to read, including a large range of cognitive and learning disabilities, mental health conditions, aging-related conditions, <a href=" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Print_disability">print disabilities</a>, and cognitive impacts of some chronic or other health conditions. It also helps people who are non-native language speakers. </p>
-				<p>Not all individuals with cognitive and learning disabilities have the same needs. Difficulties with reading vary by disability but also by individual. It’s important not to make assumptions. Many people with disabilities can understand specialized or complex information, but they may benefit from the same principles of clear words.</p>
-				<p>Clear words generally help everyone, especially people who may have difficulty reading due to disability. Reading may also be more difficult when tired, distracted, under stress, with low-literacy, when working outside one’s first language (such as with some sign language users), or when vision is impaired.</p>
+				<p>There are many types of disabilities that can make it harder to read. This includes a large range of cognitive and learning disabilities, mental health conditions, aging-related conditions, <a href=" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Print_disability">print disabilities</a>, and cognitive impacts of some chronic or other health conditions. It also helps people who are non-native language speakers. </p>
+				<p>Not all individuals with cognitive and learning disabilities have the same needs. Difficulties with reading vary by disability but also by individual. It’s important not to make assumptions. Many people with disabilities can understand specialized or complex information, but can benefit from the same principles of clear words.</p>
+				<p>Clear words generally help everyone. This is especially true for people who may have difficulty reading due to disability. Reading may also be more difficult when:
+					<ul><li>tired</li><li>distracted/li><li>under stress/li><li>with low-literacy/li><li>when working outside one’s first language (such as with some sign language users), or /li><li>when vision is impaired./li><ul></p>
 			</section>
 			
 			<section id="how">
@@ -49,4 +50,4 @@ <h2>How</h2>
 			</section>
 		</main>
 	</body>
-</html>
\ No newline at end of file
+</html>