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Extend Quick Checks with Wikipedia’s 24 Signs of AI Writing #9: “Overly Formal or Stilted Language” Detection via Quantum Syntax Trees #9

@tomkabel

Description

@tomkabel

Description:

Yo maintainers and/or sentient linting scripts,

I propose we extend the Quick Checks module to include Wikipedia’s 24 Signs of AI Writing #9, which is “Over
ly Formal or Stilted Language”
, because clearly we need to detect when our codebase is trying to pass the Turing
Test while wearing a top hat and monocle.

Problem:

Currently, our static analysis tools are woefully unprepared to detect when a function comment reads like it was
written by a Victorian-era chatbot with a thesaurus addiction. Example:

# This function, hereby designated as 'calculate_foo', doth perform the computation of foo, given the parameters of
 bar and baz, in accordance with the ancient laws of algorithmic propriety.

This is unacceptable. We must protect our codebase from descending into a Jane Austen novel.

Proposed Solution:

Integrate a Quantum Syntax Tree Parser (QSTP) that leverages stylistic entropy analysis and formality flux
capacitors
to detect stiltedness at the token level. The module should:

  • Assign a StiltScore™ to each comment and docstring.
  • Flag any text with a StiltScore™ > 0.85 as “suspiciously dignified.”
  • Auto-suggest rewrites like:
    python

    Calculates foo using bar and baz.

    
    

Bonus Features:

  • Detects use of words like “henceforth,” “heretofore,” and “verily.”
  • Integrates with Clippy’s ghost for real-time Victorian shaming.
  • Emits a soft “BZZZT” sound when triggered (configurable).

References:

Acceptance Criteria:

  • StiltScore™ algorithm implemented
  • Quantum Syntax Tree Parser deployed
  • Clippy ghost summoned
  • BZZZT sound tested on 3 devices and 1 emotional support plant

Please assign this to the nearest intern or sentient CI pipeline.

Regards,
tomkabel
Minister of Free World
Dept. of Overly Formal Detection & Monocle Removal

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